This word is tossed around frequently in the dog world. It’s used most often by rescues and force-free training advocates. Please understand before you read on that a dog’s mental health and state-of-mind are of supreme importance to me!
A dog cannot physically learn until he is mentally and emotionally prepared.
Fact.
However, the concept of allowing a dog to “decompress” before beginning training is bullshit.
Fact.
Dogs and people process experiences and feelings differently. This is not to say we have different experiences or feelings; we just process differently. People like to dwell. We like to think, many really like to overthink. We tend to live in our wounds. We need a reason for everything.
Dogs do not dwell.
Sure, they have memories and can create connotations to things- that’s the very heart of what makes them trainable. However, they do not live in their wounds and they don’t always have a reason.
Dogs who shy away from men have not necessarily been abused by men. If they’ve been neglected or homeless, this is not something they need weeks or months to overcome. What they need is structure.
I’m often asked, “When is the best time to begin training?”
My answer, “Now.”
But, he’s only 10 weeks old! Now.
But, he’s a rescue! Now.
But, he came from an abusive situation!! NOW!!
The worst thing you can do for any dog is to let them “decompress” and live in the energy of the situation that came before. Dogs don’t interpret security the same way we do. Allowing a human child to relax and get used to their new home while providing loving words and hugs, lots of healthy food, is a great idea. This is because HUMANS crave these things and read them as security.
Dogs read security in structure and boundaries. They feel safe when there is a clear leader and hierarchy in place to provide, essentially, defense. Dogs relax and open themselves when they can reduce their fear of attack. They are part of our families and members of our pack but never forget that they are animals. Instinctually, they are on the lookout for predators and they seek safety from them. Yes, some dogs think the squirrels and leaves are predators, but don’t we all make bad decisions now and then?
When you bring a dog into your home, no matter what the circumstances are, the best thing you can do is provide a strict parameters and clear leadership. This will allow him to let his guard down, knowing that you’ve got his back. You will allow nothing to hurt him. This happens not through allowing him to lounge and be babied for 30 days or three months or whatever arbitrary number you choose to assign. It happens by setting rules and boundaries, providing healthy food and exercise, giving and expecting respect and TRAINING your dog from the second he enters your orbit.
The longer you wait the longer you force your dog to make interpretations of their experience and circumstance. You confirm their fears when you placate them. Stop it. Help your dogs be the best dogs they can be by treating them lovingly and humanely like dogs.